Cereal and Milk

Finally! This is a true story, and it literally just happened. My friend who will remain anonymous, let's call him "Tom", received a jacket in the mail from his mother. Yes she is a very nice woman, but that is irrelevant from the story.

His jacket did not come in the normal mail, UPS, DHL or Fedex. It came via a friend who returned from Los Angeles. This jacket was wrapped in brown paper wrapping barely good enough for a Ralphs shopping bag, yet it contained a carefully folded jacket.

The timing could not be better, because today was a very cold day, and unfortunately only a taste of what is to come. As my friend sat with us around the table drinking, he opened the package and said that there was something else in the package, besides the jacket. What was it?

It was a box of Trix, yes the same Trix that are sugar filled treats for kids every morning from the age of 4 until the end of high school (at least during the normal breakfast hours we used to keep). So what were we to do at a bar with a box of Trix cereal?

I decided that whoever was holding the box would go up to some girls and ask them if they wanted Trix the next morning, sadly there was not one decent looking girl at the bar who was approachable; and not unapproachable in the way that a"hot girl" is unapproachable. It would be an embarrassment to all straight men who gave these women the time of day.

Since the hour is late, and I need to be up soon, I will end with this: use discretion when carrying a cereal box at a bar, because the first girl who comes up to you will not be looking to hook up or even just a free drink, she will be going straight for your TRIX!