Pursuing the Promised Land

http://opinionator.blogs.nytimes.com/2011/08/28/the-meaning-of-utopia/?hp

“Ought we to despair of utopias? I believe so, inasmuch as utopias aim, in one way or another, at perfection in the form of efficiency, happiness and justice and by calling for a qualitative, anthropological and ontological transformation in order to get there. In this they deny human finiteness – that is, the always imperfect, chaotic, irregular and accidental character of the human condition.” - Excerpt from today’s NY Times

It is human nature to make mistakes, but it’s also human nature to pursue perfection. How do we balance mistakes while pursuing perfection? The short answer is that it is part of living; however, it’s a question that cannot be answered with one brief answer. In fact there isn’t a one-size fits all response to this question that has probably bothered humans for as long as people have realized that we are not perfect.

An ideal society can only exist with people who are comfortable with where they are. This is how globalization has really occurred. There have been societies filled with people who were initially comfortable and then became oppressed for various reasons by other people. Change needed to occur, and people migrated to other regions of the world. The migration of people has been driven by two primary things: freedom and the exploration for new things. Conflicts drive people to other areas so they can feel safer and have a so called "utopia".

Interestingly, a Utopia can refer to an economy, eco-sphere, or politics and the surroundings of one person for a Utopia to exist in perfection. A personal utopia can even be a pleasant dinner, however, sometimes that pleasant dinner can be food for thought: maybe a utopia is not where you want to be... Maybe it's good to be a little uncomfortable, maybe things need to be a struggle. Which brings me to my final inspiration about words I saw on a t-shirt that someone was wearing at the gym which read: PAIN IS WEAKNESS LEAVING THE BODY.

Keeping up with I MY-DASHIAN

Scientists have spent countless hours trying to figure out why humans do what they do. They investigate the causes and effects of biology and chemistry that create reactions to different occurrences such as eating, metabolism and even culture. Every so often, we hear the word "mutation". That term usually implies a negative thing -- cancer, illness, and any other unacceptable mind, body or brain activity that is out of the norm of physiology.

I am a scientist in the respect that I think and observe, and of course use my data to make decisions. After all, isn't that what science is about? Modern technology has given us the blessing and curse of information. The notion that the more information humans have access to, the better society will get is mostly true, but at the same time, sometimes it is better to not know, because our insanely complex brains choose how and when to process the information we receive.

I recently returned from a week-long vacation, where I escaped the daily Western grind for a long enough time only to realize that the majority of the people who I interacted with were cultural Americans who had the same human issues to deal with, that have been dealt with, and moved on from. People, like seasons go through changes. These changes are guided by environmental factors the same way a season changes. Based on the most widely used calendar, a year is 365 and one quarter of a day. The people who made this calendar also added a day every 4 years in order to create a normal equilibrium so seasons happen when WE want them to happen. The same applies to us; we expose our mind and bodies to all sorts of things, and act on our exposures. When we feel like there is something wrong, or our minds tell us that change needs to be made, and we act accordingly. A food hurts my stomach - I will avoid that food, a person annoys me - I will avoid that person; on the other hand, when a food makes you feel good - it is likely that you will enjoy that food more frequently, and when you like a person you will make it your business to see that person.

This form of human evolution is uberly evident. Humans are selfish. We do what we need to do in order to survive. Every single day, we practice the societal evolution that usually goes about unspoken. No matter what gender, people experience all sorts of physical discomfort, the only thing that we can do is alleviate the problems in the most efficient and effective way. Work is the same thing, no matter what profession you are in, we have become problem solvers. Our compensation reflects the value of the problem we need to solve.

Finally, no scientist will be able to adequately figure out the exact breakdown of one specific person no matter how hard they try. There is always going to be some type of barrier to some information that is essential to mapping out a human from the brain to the mind to the unconscious to the body.

It is my belief that members of our society will get to where we really want to be when we want to be there, but there is no formula to make that happen -- that's what I've realized on my vacation. What happens next?

Flashes of Brilliance

This is a must read

The Big Journey: You never know how far you can get without going

I once tracked a romantic relationship that I had with someone as a stock. I made an excel spreadsheet with dates, highs, lows, closing price and variables of how the relationship was going. One of the variables that I investigated was the expectation (market’s expectation) going into an encounter (“encounter” is loosely used, so please use your imagination.) This was not easy to calculate because market conditions changed based on the general encounter; if it was a planned encounter the factors for expectations were based on how we last left things. In the event that we had a random encounter, the variables and expectations changed, whom we were with, who had the “home court” advantage, and the outcome obviously was the ultimate the quantifiable number that mattered. What I mean by this is that each time we had an interaction, whether it was a phone call, a random encounter or date I would quantify the value that I put on this person, this value was not a dollar value or even a percentage, it was merely a good quantifiable number range that ranged from 0 to 100. A value of zero indicated that there was no value to put effort into this person because there would be no valuable return at that point in time; that value was never assigned. A value of 100 was putting said person too high up on a pedestal where they were considered the most precious metal in an open, unregulated market, and I was the highest bidder – I would be overpaying.

Within this range I tracked our progress, how comfortable we were and the way we interacted (as company events are marked on real stocks). Obviously, the more time and more frequently we saw each other the less volatility there was in the market aka the relationship.

As things progressed I noticed trends in my actions correlating directly to the upticks and downturns in our relationship. If I “overbought” by making a gesture that overvalued the person, I saw a decline in our progress, and if I “sold off” I saw a comeback in the price and subsequent equilibrium created in our relationship.

In a sense, I had full control over a completely irrational stock in an irrational market. This person consistently possessed the qualities of a “100” stock but “paying 100” for this person was over paying, and would create a precipitous decline in this person’s value. However, creating a lower value created a buying opportunity where the price set as a result of my actions of “selling” off by backing away from the person paid off.

Fear and emotion are relatively newer concepts that have been added to rational economic theory. The only fear that I encountered during this study was the fear of the unknown, which is solved simply by testing a theory.

Given the recent events of the stock market volatility, it has come to my attention that the stock market has been acting the same way I have seen my test relationship portray itself. In mid-July, on the over-priced heels of the end of QE2 when corporate America was releasing earnings results that were well beyond Wall Street’s expectations, the market was essentially a “100.” You couldn’t pay more, but you had to pay more in order to reap the benefits. Now, the market is in panic mode, the market knows that it was put up on pedestal, and we as a nation became too available.

The New York Times published an article discussing neurofinance, a relatively new term that has tried to explain how “our primal circuit can, and often do, override our reason when it comes to investing.”

According to this article, investor sentiment changed after the collapse of the markets three years ago. The same can potentially be said about a person’s relationship sentiment following a failed relationship. The failures in the market have proved that people lack confidence in their relationship with the market moving forward. Contrast this to someone being hesitant about entering into a new relationship of any sort after experiencing any type of “relationship malfunction,” and you begin to realize that this crazy time in the market is a lot like life. We never really know what is going to happen next no matter how much we prepare ourselves.

The stock market experience, like the relationship experience will open you up to something new and exotic, those that are old and familiar, those that bring up lots of questions, those that bring you somewhere unexpected, those that bring you far from where you started, and those that bring you back. But the most exciting, challenging and significant relationship of all is the one you have with yourself; and if you can find someone to love you that you love, well, that's just fabulous. In today’s market it is important to find value, be cautious, keep your guard up and most importantly, remember that learning from experience is what builds a beautiful mind.

The Importance of Support

Due to the recent and untimely death of the young and talented Amy Winehouse, I began to think and analyze the circumstances regarding the singer's demise. When the news scattered the Twitterworld and the all the news outlets picked up on the news of her death, the world reacted with a guarded sadness -- people were not THAT shocked to hear that a Grammy winning twenty-seven year old had been found dead in her London apartment.

Winehouse’ experiences with drugs, alcohol, and the scrutiny of her romantic life have all been overshadowed by her immense talent. Her five Grammy Awards and revitalization of the music industry are proof enough that the singer had a "good life." That was from an outsiders point of view. The "success" that she experienced from a very young age that catapulted her to a level of super-stardom and immortality all came crashing down on Saturday. An autopsy is scheduled for Monday, but no arrests have been made, and the mere speculation that this death is drug related cannot be ignored as the cause of death, then again, we won't know definitively until autopsy results are released.

Drug abuse has become a very real issue that has been publicized, especially in the celebrity world. Throughout the modern "celebrity era" there have been dozens of drug related premature deaths of actors, singers and entertainers. The world has been saddened briefly by these events and then moved on. With the emergence of "Celebrity Rehab" on VH1 and shows that deal with the trafficking and growing use of drugs as innocent as marijuana to severe abuse of doctor prescribed drugs and homemade drugs, a legitimacy has evolved to drug use.

Amy Winehouse had a net worth a tens of millions of dollars, she could have almost anything that she wanted, and yet she is dead at 27 years old. We all know she has battled addiction, something that is clinically a life-long disease that needs to consistently be treated. The singer made people happy with her music, and her life was presumably cut short by a demon that had haunted her for a long time.

Sadness is a universal feeling that all humans are capable of feeling. Many people seek healthy remedies such as therapy, exercises and activities that stimulate the brain to be happier. Unfortunately, there are other people who use drugs to cope with the sometimes harsh realities of life. Friends and family are the best support for anyone dealing with any sort of sadness or feeling of emptiness in one's life; yet sometimes as Coldplay once said "you get what want, but not what you need." This may have been Amy's life.

We don't choose our parents and lives that come with the turmoil or bliss of being born, but we have a choice to face life head on, but it doesn't hurt to have a support group to make the hardest days that much easier.

RIP Amy.

A Woman's Right to Choose Her Food

Literally billions of years of pregnancy have taken place with people eating meat, wheat or chicken, it's yours for the picken"

Emily Deschanel has been a vegan for along time and pregnant for a lot less. She has been able to do what is best for her body, wouldn't you think that she would be doing best her growing fetus' body?

The debate should cease about what is and what isn't good for a fetus. Maternal instincts often speak louder than any other authority figure; and in this situation the mother is always right. Eating as a vegan in a non-vegan society cannot be easy, but is completely doable. There are ongoing counterproductive remarks against people who choose a specific and even more so when someone is carrying a child.

The religious tolerance that this world experiences borders on the intolerance of certain people's dietary restrictions and beliefs. People who come up to me and are shocked that I am unable to tolerate certain foods look at me like a I some type of leper. I have not only done nothing wrong, but I have embraced a lifestyle that leaves me more comfortable. So the next time you want to make a pregnant woman uncomfortable, remember that she is probably carrying a baby that is making her uncomfortable enough.

Eat up, drink up, and enjoy life.... Just let people do it in the way that I want. (disclaimer: when I say "drink up" I do not mean in any way shape or form drinking alcohol during pregnancy.

Modern Orthodox: not my M.O

Many people will not like what I have to say. Good.

Tonight I went to a "Modern Orthodox" Synagogue to commemorate the third anniversary of my father's passing. The Hebrew term for this is "Yartzheit." I toiled with the idea of going to a place of worship, because quite honestly I don't buy it. I asked some of my closest friends what I should do, and the consensus was to go. I tried going to a synagogue that was not immersed in the community that I was raised in, but the weekday nightly prayers are scarce in Los Angeles.

I ended up going with my oldest sister and mother to the place I spent countless hours on Saturdays during my formative years. As a child, I had no say in the matter, the same way I ate when I was told, and not when I wanted to eat. As an adolescent, my "choices" were pushed, and I accepted it... and then I grew up. There was no quantifiable difference in me spiritually throughout the years, I merely became the person I wanted to be. Not a person who prays, not someone who observes Orthodox Judaism, I am a Jewish person, period. Label me how you want.

As I entered the sanctuary (they really need to change the name of this room) of Beth Jacob in Beverly Hills, I saw someone from my formative years who I did not care to see. I didn't run away, I faked a smile and said "Hi, it's so great to see you!" Those words that came out of my mouth in my head were actually "I have to see this fucking tool?" I walked in to see some familiar faces, none of which I was excited to see. I semi-cordially had a Lakers discussion with a 75 year-old accountant who I've seen age as he's seen me grow up - wonderful.

I sat in the back, zoning out all the bullshit that was being recited by the cantor. In between the afternoon prayer "Mincha" and the evening prayer "Ma'ariv" some guy from Yeshiva University, who is paid to study Talmud all day for the summer gave a speech about the concept of a Kohen -- the most sanctified tribe member, for lack of a better term -- killing someone and his repercussions. The answer to his remedial question is : who the hell cares? He rambled on for about five minutes aimlessly, and suddenly, out of nowhere someone in the audience abruptly cut him off and left the speaker humiliated and speechless. In Judaism, the action of embarrassing someone is compared to killing that person. The fact is, that no matter how terrible this speech was, it was 100% wrong of this low-life to cut off the speaker for no reason at all.

The thesis of the speech was completely out of context and relevance to anything today or even in the last 100 years. The irrelevance factor annoyed me, even pissed me off a little bit -- I was somewhere that I did not want to be hearing about bullshit that will NEVER apply to anyone in the audience. IF anyone ever kills someone, the justice system will run its course, for better or worse. The insensitivity of this person cutting off another idiot clearly didn't solve anything. It did not help ease my discomfort of being somewhere that I totally did not want to be, I should have been wearing one of those t shirts that say "I'd rather be skiing." As a person who chooses not to take part in these rituals, and paying my respect to my dead father by saying meaningless words on a specific day on the Jewish calendar, I was completely offended and mortified that this is what a Modern Orthodox synagogue was offering. I knew better growing up, I saw it coming, and I even saw some of the brainwashing that took place to some of my peers to become these black an white people who are obsessed with anything Judaism related. To me, it's the same as someone who gets into drugs, alcohol or any other addiction that makes people go crazy.

This is a synagogue that is not foreign to scandals. Please ask me about the scandals if you are so interested, I promise they are juicy. Disrespecting people by offending them publicly is wrong. I had to witness it, which completely devalued any attempt I had at getting any meaning from the service tonight. Thanks Beth Jacob.

I'm writing this blog to inform, not to get people to stop going or go elsewhere. There is just too much bullshit out there to worry about the bullshit religion that labels itself in ways that are just silly. I respect people, and listening to this bullshit that was then cut off rather maliciously, completely undermined my feelings of celebrating the beautiful but short life of my father who accepted me for who I am, the same way he accepted everyone else with all f their baggage.

I started this blog by saying that many people will be unhappy with what I have to say, synagogues don't have that disclaimer before you enter; maybe they should.